tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post7937714519852868208..comments2024-03-16T02:47:26.441+13:00Comments on This Fluid Thrill: The Man in The MirrorCraig Cliffhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04683220586520558481noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-90564061266706954002016-11-01T02:54:48.172+13:002016-11-01T02:54:48.172+13:00Man in mirror is good and wonderful concept. The a...Man in mirror is good and wonderful concept. The abilities of the man in mirror are floated in order <a href="http://www.writingserviceuk.com/assignment-uk/" rel="nofollow">find someone to write essay for you</a> for all success and man in mirror the possibility is devised.Jacksonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-85331573372973211262011-06-18T12:06:20.973+12:002011-06-18T12:06:20.973+12:00Hi Craig,
Woops, I didn't read the above pos...Hi Craig, <br /><br />Woops, I didn't read the above posts carefully before bunging in my bit.<br /><br /> On reflection, what I was thinking of was Move #2 (not exposed revision) '...starting a line with the final clause from previous line's sentence and finishing it with a short sentence...' <br /><br />when you wrote<br /><br />...it is hard to believe/in the existence of sentient beings/in need of blessings. It feels as if we/are the first rush of mortals...<br /><br />any way, really enjoyed the yak poem, thanks.<br /><br />Penny K.Pennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13089732875715541671noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-21708902163837571572011-06-17T08:11:36.614+12:002011-06-17T08:11:36.614+12:00Hi Penny
Not sure I see any exposed revision myse...Hi Penny<br /><br />Not sure I see any exposed revision myself. You may be right, though. Care to provide some supporting evidence?<br /><br />(And just for fun, as Sarah has already won the prize)<br /><br />CraigCraig Cliffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04683220586520558481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-14885208600032035812011-06-16T21:25:33.655+12:002011-06-16T21:25:33.655+12:00Is it Number one, exposed revision?
Penny Kennett...Is it Number one, exposed revision?<br /><br />Penny KennettPenny Kennettnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-60687933206876516362011-06-10T21:21:53.004+12:002011-06-10T21:21:53.004+12:00Hi Sarah
Yeah, I reckon you're right. Move 21...Hi Sarah<br /><br />Yeah, I reckon you're right. Move 21 is a bit vague (a lot of lines break before or after a verb, for numerous reasons...), but a case can be made that I broke the clause "a squinting / guide" to build some suspense ("what's squinting? oh, it's the guide").<br /><br />An obvious example of move 21 to me is in the 2nd stanza: "the desire to suspend / our sentences".<br /><br />Anyway congratulations! Email me your address (thecraigcliff[at]gmail.com)and I'll post you a copy of A Man Melting (or one of the others if you've changed your mind).<br /><br />CraigCraig Cliffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04683220586520558481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-706588639740998982.post-28399678678245317852011-06-10T19:35:04.638+12:002011-06-10T19:35:04.638+12:00I associate ravens with old castles and the like, ...I associate ravens with old castles and the like, it must be the Tower of London effect.<br /><br />Maybe Move 21. squinting<br /><br />I'd really like to read your book.Sarahnoreply@blogger.com